March 31, 2010

Husband: How much do you love your wife?

Posted in Uncategorized tagged , , at 7:47 pm by 1thing2think

Ephesians 5 (NKJV):

25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30for we are members of his body. 31″For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

I usually say to the folks who attend the bible study (to the guys, who are mostly single): Make sure that when you get married, you’d be willing to die for your wife, just like when you are willing to sacrifice everything (or anything) to get her. Perhaps, my advice won’t work if you have an arranged marriage. But you got the point.

While teaching this, I don’t really think that it’s an extreme. Many would think so. After all, the jokes are quite rampant regarding a husband and wife relationships. A friend of mine found that working is a great way to get off his nagging/constantly yapping wife. He’d rather be at the office rather than at home. Everybody was kind of laughing when he mentioned that. I chuckled too, but deep down, I don’t want to have that kind of life.  I mean, why bother to marry if the marriage life is awful?

The key verse (v.25) above mentioned it clearly: Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her. Gave himself up for the church. Guys, do you give yourself up for your wife?  The verse teach us (the guy) give up to the wife, not give up to the marriage!  No, I didn’t reach that stage or, else, I won’t be writing this piece. But how can someone have that same kind of passion and keep the passion flaming?

I am by no means an expert if it’s measured by how long I have been married, but then again, neither are many of those married couples who have been married for more. I am usually sad (and it does sunk in for a while) if I heard that married couples are going for divorce. That episode of life wouldn’t cross their minds when they were at the nuptial. (I do suspect some do, however. But these are exceptions)

There are things that a pair of marriage couple must understand. The Word say that marriage is a profound mystery. There is leaving and cleaving (v. 31). Then, at the end of the quoted passage, it give a good advice: “A husband must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband”. It will take a leadership of a man to gave up for his wife, but then it will also take a wife to respect her husband to make a marriage to work.

Let’s not debate on which one has to started first: Is it the husband? Is it the wife? Yes, it may look like a chicken and egg situation. I can say that guys, it’s your responsibility just like Jesus come to earth and die for the church. But then, I can say again, had it not been Mary’s (a lady) willingness to bear Jesus, Jesus may not be born. But let’s scratch that endless loop, and start with a new beginning. I’d propose for the guys to start first. Be responsible by sacrifice.

What do I hope from my own marriage? I asked this questions many times to myself. All I know so far, I’d like to have a successful life- the life that God has promised through Jesus Christ. I don’t have a specific answer to this question, but I know its meaningful answer: that it’s an abundant life and nothing can describe or fathom it.

The ultimate question (for the husband) linger: are you willing to die for your wife? Ladies, please don’t mock your husband if you read this and demand him to have this kind of love. If you respect and honor him, he will eventually be willing to give himself for you.


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